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Welcome to the PainSupport Newsletter
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Editor: Jan Sadler
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No.160, August 2008
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Hot Buttons !
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By Jan Sadler
of PainSupport
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We all have hot buttons –I wonder if you know what yours are
and how to deal with them? When you find out, it will help reduce stress
and pain.
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Hot buttons are where you are most sensitive, where you get
hurt, angry or irritated and just have to respond. It's when somebody or
something pushes you to the point of frustration and into conflict and
stress. Hot buttons carry a strong emotional charge and so the reaction
also tends to be extreme. It's pure basic emotion. The stress caused by
someone triggering a hot button can affect your physical and emotional
well-being, causing extra pain.
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Hot buttons are very personal, no
two people’s are the same.
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Here's how to
find your own hot buttons:
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Write down as many occasions as
you can where you acted or spoke hastily or became overly upset and
regretted it later.
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Now write what it was that
triggered each reaction. Was it something somebody said or was it
something they did?
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When you have quite a long list,
look for patterns. Can you see a pattern of the kind of situation that
triggers your hot buttons? There may be more than one cause.
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What creates hot buttons in the first place? They usually
come from our childhood, triggered initially by something that upset us
deeply and about which we became super-sensitive.
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Cooling down your hot buttons
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The way to stop a hot button reaction developing is through
awareness. The more aware you are of your own hot buttons, the more
you’ll be able to catch yourself and stop before you become upset or
'lose it'.
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Of course, you may inadvertently trigger other people’s hot
buttons too. So if someone flies off the handle unexpectedly you can
regard it with understanding and not take it personally. We can’t change
anyone else’s reaction – but we can change our own.
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The way to deal with a hot button of yours that’s been
triggered is to call a mental 'time-out' to try to calm the situation so
that you don't respond hastily. Try the method below.
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STOP!
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Stop everything and look out of the
window/at your watch/a picture on the wall or something neutral around
you whilst you calm down.
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Breathe gently, but deeply, right
down into your abdomen.
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On the out-breath, say slowly to
yourself,
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"Stay calm… stay calm..."
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Repeat a couple of times until
you feel calmer.
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When things don't go your way, say
to yourself something along the lines of,
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"It will all work out for
the best. Thinking calmly and rationally about it will
help me to think of new ideas and ways forward another time."
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and/or
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"OK, you feel bad at the
moment, but it will pass."
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Once you become aware of any reaction to someone pressing a
hot button, yours or someone else’s, you'll be able to say to yourself,
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"Come on, don't get upset,
it's just that old hot button again!"
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© Jan at PainSupport
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Alexander Technique – Latest Research
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Latest research - Alexander Technique best for backpain.
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news.bbc.co.uk
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Philip Pawley, a teacher of the Alexander Technique in Liverpool, has many interesting articles for those
in pain on his site, EnduringResults.com.
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www.enduringresults.com
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Stress Reducing Tip
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Focus gently
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When in pain or
stressed, your head and eyes move more erratically than normal, and, as a
result, your body may feel quite unstable and off-balance. Quieten your
body and mind by focussing on a point in front of you - don't stare hard
at it, just gently focus. Staring hard will cause more tension.
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As your eyes
soften, become aware of the colours and shapes around you. Let your eyes
stay soft, and allow the softness to spread into the whole area
around your eyes, allowing that area also to soften and widen.
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It worked for me!
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One of
our PainSupport members in Canada says,
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"I
use a soft rubber exercise ball which I squeeze and concentrate on the
feeling of the ball. What you do is concentrate on the feeling in your
hands and not in your pain areas.
My doctors are so proud of me that I don't depend on medication
alone to control pain."
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Please tell us!!
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If you
try any product or therapy that helps you in some way, do let us
know. Even if it only reduces
symptoms a little it may help others too.
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ItWorkedForMe@PainSupport.co.uk
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Prescriptions
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Did you
know that Boots pharmacy now have various helpful ways of dispensing your
prescriptions:
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- at
your local Boots store
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- by
post with a freepost envelope provided by Boots
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- by freephone on 0808 208-8000
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online via
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www.boots.com/pharmacy
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And you
can receive them:
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- at
your local Boots store
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delivered safely and securely to your home
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delivered to your workplace
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delivered to your local post office
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For further
details: ask for a free leaflet at Boots stores, call 0845 121 9040 or go
to the Boots website as above.
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Website Recommendation
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The Silence of Music
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Over 250,000 people world-wide use
John Levine's ‘alpha music’ to help cope with the symptoms of anxiety and
stress.
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www.silenceofmusic.com
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The PainSupport Newsletter
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If you have a friend who you think would like our newsletter,
please pass it on.
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If you’re reading this and aren’t already signed up for your
own copy, just write to us and we’ll add you to our mailing list, PLUS
you’ll be first to hear of the latest news, offers, etc, AND receive the
PainSupport Tool Kit – a beginner’s guide to pain relief methods!
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signmeup@painsupport.co.uk
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Tool Kit
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If you liked any of the above
ideas why not keep them in your Tool Kit notebook or folder of self-help
pain relief methods. Your Tool Kit is especially useful when pain flares
up. It will give you constructive ideas to focus upon so you can move
forwards.
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NB Don’t forget your FREE
Pain Logs – find them near the end of the newsletter.
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The
PainSupport Contact Club
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An Invitation…
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If you’re not already a member,
why not join our highly successful, popular and free Confidential Contact
Club? Ease the pain by sharing life's ups and downs with those who understand.
Here is message recently received from D, a US member of the PainSupport Contact
Club,
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"I have just received my first contact from a lovely
lady in England.
It's a lovely to have someone to talk to about everything. Thank you for
the great newsletters and all the information on your PainSupport website
which is really useful. I thought I was alone until I found
PainSupport."
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How to access the Contact Club...
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Go to www.painsupport.co.uk
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Click Making Contact
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Click Main Menu on the left
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Click Contact Club
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You will then see "Wish to
Join the Contact Club?"
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Click where it says 'Please click
here to Register' and complete the brief registration form.
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Words of wisdom
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“The future depends on what we do in the present.”
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- - Quote from Mahatma Gandhi
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Keep Smiling…
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The things kids say!
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JAMES (age 4) was listening to a Bible story. His dad read:
'The man named Lot was warned to take
his wife and flee out of the city but his wife looked back and was turned
to salt.' Concerned, James asked: 'What happened to the flea?'
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MELANIE (age 5) asked her Granny how old she was. Granny
replied she was so old she didn't remember any more. Melanie said, 'If
you don't remember you must look in the back of your panties. Mine say
five to six.'
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BRITTANY (age 4) had an
ear ache and wanted a pain killer. She tried in vain to take the lid off
the bottle. Seeing her frustration, her mother explained it was a
child-proof cap and she'd have to open it for her. Eyes wide with wonder,
the little girl asked: 'How does it know it's me?'
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Editor’s Note
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I hope you find the above ideas
useful. For more information and ideas for pain relief, please go to the PainSUPPORT website, address below. Follow the
shopping links to the Useful Products/Books or ‘Tapes’ pages for my Downloads, CDs and books.
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All best wishes – and keep
smiling!
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Jan at PainSupport
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www.painsupport.co.uk
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Your FREE ‘pain logs’!
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Print as many copies as you
need. They will help you keep track of your pain, find out what affects
it, and can be use for medical consultations, if necessary, to show your
doctor how your pain affects you.
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a) www.painsupport.co.uk/enewsletter/painlevelslog.pdf
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This log will be a record of
your actual pain level.
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b) www.painsupport.co.uk/enewsletter/painfeelingsandactivitylog.pdf
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This log will help you to
discover how your activities and feelings may affect your pain.
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You may print the above
Newsletter for your own personal and private use but if you wish to use
all or part of it for any other reason, please ask first. Copyright
belongs to Jan Sadler.
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Many of the tips in this
Newsletter are not from medical sources, so please use your own discretion
or, preferably, check it out with your doctor, before trying any of the
suggestions. Please also have any undiagnosed pain checked out by a
doctor.
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Products, sites and
organisations mentioned in the Newsletter are merely being brought to
your attention. Check everything yourself before purchasing or acting on
any of the information. PainSupport is not responsible for the content of
any other website mentioned.
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Unsubscribe: If you no longer
wish to receive the PainSupport Newsletter, please let us know. unsubscribe@painsupport.co.uk
PainSupport NEVER passes on your
email address to anyone else without your prior permission.
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Copyright © Jan Sadler 2008
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